Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday

A Few Phrases from the July Birthday Children’ Desk 

“Ladies of colour have extra political energy than ever earlier than. We’re Governors, Senators, Attorneys Normal, and Members of Congress. I stand with all of my sisters in Congress and throughout the nation—we’re not backing down and we aren’t going anyplace.“—Rep. Barbara Lee

“Posterity: you’ll by no means know the way a lot it has value my technology to protect your freedom. I hope you’ll make good use of it.”—John Quincy Adams

“The Ku Klux Klan by no means dies. They only cease carrying sheets as a result of sheets value an excessive amount of.”—Justice Thurgood Marshall

Continued…

“Hear, I have a profound reverence for all times and an abiding respect for selection. The query is, whose resolution is it? And I occur to assume {that a} affected person’s room is simply too small a spot for a lady, her physician, and the federal government. I feel that is too many individuals within the room.”—Sen. Raphael Warnock

“Training is the good engine of non-public improvement. It’s via schooling that the daughter of a peasant can change into a physician, {that a} son of a mineworker can change into the pinnacle of the mine, {that a} youngster of farm staff can change into the president of an awesome nation. It’s what we make out of what we’ve, not what we’re given, that separates one individual from one other.“—Nelson Mandela

“It’s 105 right here on the ranch. In case you stay in Texas, make sure you keep indoors and maintain cool between 11:00 AM and November.“—Ruth Buzzi

“America… only a nation of 200 million used automobile salesmen with all the cash we have to purchase weapons and no qualms about killing anyone else on the planet who tries to make us uncomfortable.“—Hunter S. Thompson

“Earth has simply skilled its hottest days on report, and we have to deal with this just like the local weather and public well being emergency it’s.”—Sen. Ed Markey (D-MA)

“It’s exceptional that amongst all of the preachers there are so few ethical academics. The prophets are employed in excusing the methods of males.”—Henry David Thoreau

“Idiot me as soon as, disgrace on…disgrace on me. [Long pause.] Idiot me cannot get fooled once more!”—George W. Bush

To the above and people in our Every day Kos group who accomplished one other journey across the solar this month, in individual or in spirit: completely happy birthday and lots of blessings in your camels.

And now, our characteristic presentation…

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Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, July 12, 2023

Notice: Resulting from a torrid tryst together with her upkeep man that she will’t get out of, Mrs. Gladwin can be late for Pilates class in the present day.  She regrets the inconvenience and says begin with out her and she or he’ll catch up.

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By the Numbers:

Days ’til Nationwide Ice Cream Day: 4

Days ’til the Nationwide Child Meals Competition in Fremont, Michigan: 7

Drop in wholesale used automobile costs from Might to June: 4.2%

Drop in wholesale used automobile costs from June 2022 to June 2023: 10.3%

% drop in Twitter site visitors from a yr in the past at the moment: 11%

% probability that Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen’s current talks with Chinese language president Xi Jinping’s new financial group had been “direct, substantive and productive” in response to Yellen: 100%

Anticipated quantity People will spend on chocolate this yr: $26 billion

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Mid-week Rapture Index: 182 (together with 4 beast governments and 1 Finish Occasions-triggering gentle beer).  Soul Safety Issue 12 lotion is beneficial in the event you’ll be strolling amongst the heathen in the present day.

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Pet Pic of the Day: This woozle is adorbs and I shall Brooke no dissent…

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CHEERS to circling the wagons. He is not getting practically the accolades he deserves, so let me spell it out plain: President Biden—that foul-mouth motherf*cker—is clobbering Vladimir Putin. He is tanning his cover, consuming his lunch, consuming his milkshake, and doling out purple nurples on his shriveled nipples. As Russia‘s invasion of Ukraine bogs down in a swamp of incompetence, corruption, and 14th-century army know-how, Joe is in Lithuania corralling the assets and resolve of NATO throughout its forty seventh summit with smarts, expertise, carefully-cultivated diplomatic relationships, and steely-eyed resolve to assist preserve unified assist for President Zelenskyy’s freedom fighters. Now, due to his sure-handed route, the group is about to develop once more:

Sweden’s anticipated accession to NATO following Turkey‘s backing of the Nordic nation’s NATO bid sends a “very robust message” to Russian President Vladimir Putin concerning aggression in opposition to Ukraine, U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken instructed “CBS Mornings” Tuesday.

Putin is “not going to outlast Ukraine, and the earlier he ends this warfare of aggression, the higher,” Blinken stated.  […]

Sweden utilized final yr to hitch NATO together with Finland, which turned the thirty first member of the North Atlantic Treaty Group this yr. On Monday, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan agreed to assist Sweden‘s bid to hitch the alliance after assembly with Swedish Prime Minister Ulf Kristersson.  

As soon as the ratification of Sweden is full, Russia will quickly meet a brand new and fearsome weapon on the battlefield combining pace, firepower, and psychological warfare: Volvos with howitzers blaring ABBA’s Waterloo.

JEERS to swelter skelter.  How do you individuals within the south stay with this shit??  After probably the most nice of early summers, with temps within the 60s and 70s, the mercury’s going to spike to 90 right here in the present day with 140% humidity and one thing referred to as a “dewpoint” that causes storm clouds to type in our lounge. Fortunately, we Mainers have a handbook on cope with unbearable summer season climate, and it is value revisiting.  Step 1: put lengthy johns within the freezer in a single day.  Step 2: affix ice cubes to earmuffs with rubber bands.  Step 3: Drink ’til you move out and pray a chilly entrance strikes via when you’re unconscious.  If anybody asks what the sweetest sound within the English language is in the present day, my reply is unambiguous: “September.”

CH’CHING to cash, cash all over the place. Nobody matched all of the numbers within the newest Powerball jackpot, so the following pile of money is value the equal of 732,323,232 99-cent value-packs of Brach’s sweet corn. In case you play, C&J reminds you: please have a snowball’s probability in hell responsibly.

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BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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CHEERS to a person who knew his manner round a one-room cabin within the woods. Completely satisfied birthday to Henry David Thoreau, born 206 years in the past on July 12, 1817. He instructed the world to “Simplify! Simplify!”  And his writings on civil disobedience influenced many, together with Martin Luther King,Jr., who wrote in his autobiography:

I turned satisfied that noncooperation with evil is as a lot an ethical obligation as is cooperation with good. No different individual has been extra eloquent and passionate in getting this concept throughout than Henry David Thoreau.

On account of his writings and private witness, we’re the heirs of a legacy of inventive protest. The teachings of Thoreau got here alive in our civil rights motion; certainly, they’re extra alive than ever earlier than.

Whether or not expressed in a sit-in at lunch counters, a freedom journey into Mississippi, a peaceable protest in Albany, Georgia, a bus boycott in Montgomery, Alabama, these are outgrowths of Thoreau’s insistence that evil should be resisted and that no ethical man can patiently alter to injustice.

By the best way, in the event you’re seeking to purchase the right housewarming reward for a Walden lover, we nonetheless say you’ll be able to’t go flawed with a Thoreau rug.

CHEERS to abandoning your basic on the battlefield. Behold the story of Tucker Carlson. Manly man. Righteous warrior main the cost below the MAGA banner. Mighty American patriot exposing the tyranny of the deep state, the vile racism of Black individuals in direction of White individuals, and the depraved methods of the “groomer” drag queens. Then…stabbed within the again on his personal turf by Fox Information! Crawled to the secure haven of Twitter the place he sewed up his wounds, rallied his testicle-tanning troops, and took as soon as once more to the airwaves—on Twitter this time—from a survival bunker beneath a cabin within the woods. His military of trustworthy Accomplice flag wavers tuned in and pledged to their resurgent chief, like a phoenix from the ashes, that they…had higher issues to do:

Tucker on Twitter…debuted in June with what gave the impression to be robust scores. His first present garnered greater than 26 million “video views,” a Twitter metric that counts a view as anybody who watches a video for greater than 2 seconds.

It isn’t probably the most dependable metric for the recognition of a present since many individuals would possibly simply be scrolling previous it.

However regardless of the faults of the metric, it has declined considerably over the course of his final eight exhibits. His most up-to-date present, for example, solely obtained 3.8 million video views.

That is an 86 % drop.

Or as regular individuals name it: an 86 % enchancment.

P.S. Talking of losers, I noticed a MyPillow advert wherein Mike Lindell proudly proclaims that his firm is doing so effectively that he’s needed to rent a bunch of latest staff. I assume he wants these further arms to assist public sale off a whole bunch of items of kit and sublease manufacturing house after a number of purchasing networks and main retailers took the corporate’s merchandise off cabinets. Hold livin’ the dream, man. Hold livin’ the dream.

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Ten years in the past in C&J: July 12, 2013

CHEERS to anticipation. This may very well be a BIG day.  William and Kate (okay, principally Kate) could delivery a bouncing child blueblood, and Harry Reid could resolve how he will change the Senate guidelines to assist curb rampant Republican filibuster abuse.  There can be crying, flying spittle, poopy drawers and many basic fussiness.  And I am positive that’ll even be the case with William and Kate’s child.

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And only one extra…

JEERS to “Second Modification treatments.”  219 years in the past in the present day, Treasury Secretary, Founding Father and Boy Surprise Alexander Hamilton died after dueling in Weehawken, New Jersey, immediately throughout from Manhattan. With Hamilton mania a seemingly perpetual factor, you are most likely anticipating me to publish some video clip from the 300-Tony-Award-winning Broadway smash. Ha ha, fooled ya. I by no means miss a legitimate excuse to decide as an alternative for Michael Bay’s smash hit Promoting-Corridor-of-Fame industrial with the killer setup another time:

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Bwahvo.

Have a contented humpday. Flooring’s open…What are you cheering and jeering about in the present day?

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At the moment’s Shameless C&J Testimonial

Sad along with your intercourse life? You’ll be able to repair it, however the work begins exterior of the Cheers and Jeers kiddie pool.

—USA At the moment

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